


The Police and the Police Box

by wendymr



Category: Doctor Who (2005), Lewis (TV)
Genre: Angst, Crossover, Friendship, Gen, Illustrated Fic, fandom stocking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-05
Updated: 2012-01-05
Packaged: 2017-10-29 00:32:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/313878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wendymr/pseuds/wendymr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A police phone box parked outside the Radcliffe Camera in Oxford? A practical joke, or could it really be a spaceship?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Police and the Police Box

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KerrAvonsen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KerrAvonsen/gifts).



> A rather silly crossover for Fandom Stocking - hope you enjoy!

****

“Sir? What’s that doing there?”

Detective Inspector Robbie Lewis pauses on Radcliffe Square and turns to see where his sergeant is pointing. There, right in front of the Camera, is something he hasn’t seen since he was a teenager growing up in Newcastle: a police phone box.

 

“You got me.” He shrugs. “Some sort o’ practical joke?”

Hathaway’s mouth turns down. “Freshers’ Week isn’t until next month.”

“Publicity stunt? Doesn’t matter. Still shouldn’t be there.” He glances around,: the area’s filled with tourists milling around and taking photos, and residents and local workers on their way to their destinations. Oddly, it doesn’t look as if anyone else is paying the police box any attention whatsoever.

“Get on the phone and get some uniforms out here to take care of it,” Lewis says after a moment. “It’s not exactly CID’s business, is it?”

Hathaway’s already talking to someone. After a minute or so, he slides his phone back into his jacket pocket and stares at the police box again, hands in his trouser pockets. “Bit of an antique, sir, isn’t it? I mean, how long is it since they’ve been in use? Before I was born, I think.” He studies Lewis for a moment. “Were they still around when you were in uniform?”

“Oi!” He’s seriously tempted to cuff his cheeky sergeant around the ear. “How old d’you think I am?”

Hathaway gives him an angelic smile. “Not making any assumptions, sir. I just wondered.”

“Well, they weren’t, all right? Now, come on.”

“Couple of minutes?” The eagerness in Hathaway’s expression is hard to combat. “I’ve never actually seen one before.”

“Oh, go on, then.” He fakes a long-suffering sigh and waves at his partner. “Just don’t be long.”

 

***

“Whole wide universe to choose from, an’ you want to come to Oxford? What’s that all about?”

Rose grins. “Never been. Seen it on the telly an’ thought it’d be nice.”

“Could’ve taken National Express any time you wanted.”

She bumps his hip. “Why do I need to? Got the TARDIS. An’ my own personal driver.”

“That all I am to you, Rose Tyler?”

“Nah. Good tour-guide, too. I’d give you five stars on that website Mickey checks. Though I dunno, might have to knock something off for the _running for our lives_ bit. Not sure most people count almost gettin’ killed as the highlight of their holiday.”

 

 

“Why not? Experience of a lifetime, that.” He catches hold of her hand. “Come on. You wanted to see Oxford, and that’s what you’re gonna get. By the time I’m finished with you, you’ll never want to see another mediaeval college again.”

 

***

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, sir. There’s nothing there.”

Lewis huffs impatiently. “What are you talking about, Constable? It’s right in front of you.”

“Sorry, sir.” The uniformed officer waves a hand vaguely in front of him. “All I see’s a few bicycles chained to the railings.”

 

 

Hathaway marches forward and slams a hand against the panelling. “There!”

Slowly, the constable shakes his head. Lewis can practically read his thoughts: what have the two of them been smoking? “Need to get your eyes tested, Constable,” he comments, unable to hide his irritation.

The uniform’s clearly struggling to hold back his real thoughts. “Just did. Last week.” He pauses. “Sir.”

Hathaway leans against the side of the police box and catches Lewis’s eye, his own eyes wide. Lewis shakes his head faintly.

“If there’s nothing else, _sir_ , I’ve got another call,” the constable says, then nods and walks away.

“What the hell?” Lewis walks over to join Hathaway beside the police box. “We’re not imagining it. I know we’re not.”

Hathaway walks around the box, studying it intently, and stops by the door. He pulls the handle; it doesn’t open. He opens the phone compartment; it’s empty. “I’m baffled, sir.” He gives Lewis a quizzical look. “Suppose we should... I mean, it’s hardly CID business, as you said.”

“It is now,” Lewis announces. “Someone dumps a bloody great police box on my patch that somehow only we can see? I’m not leavin’ that alone, even if I haven’t a clue how to explain it.”

He doesn’t miss the pleased smile on Hathaway’s face.

 

***

Oxford’s pretty, he’ll give Rose that, even if it is too full of poncey students for his liking. It’s not even term-time; what are they all still doing here?

“Come on.” He tugs on her hand and hurries her along the High, back to where they left the TARDIS. “Did you know there’s an entire planet that’s a university? Take you there now if you like. New Cambridge, it’s called. They decided on the name based on who won the Boat Race that year.” He grins. “Oxford lost.”

“Good job it wasn’t a dead heat.” Rose grins.

They round the corner into Radcliffe Square, and he stops dead. Some lanky bloke in a suit’s actually leaning against his TARDIS. And there’s another one trying the door. Bloody cheek!

“Oi!” he shouts, dropping Rose’s hand and running for the TARDIS. “Get away from that!”

Lanky blond straightens and looks at him. “Did you leave this here, sir?”

“Yeah. So?”

“Did you obtain a permit?”

“What?” He looks up to the heavens. “I don’t need a _permit..._ You shouldn’t even be able to see it! There’s a perception filter. Rose-” He glances back at her. “No-one sees the TARDIS. No-one!”

She shrugs. “Mickey an’ Mum do.”

“That’s ‘cause they know it’s there now. But no-one else-”

“Sir.” Lanky posh bloke’s standing right in front of him.

 

“What!” He glares at the annoying human. “Can’t you see I’m busy? Anyway, ‘s none of your business.”

“I regret to say that it is.” A leather wallet’s held in front of him and opened. “Detective Sergeant James Hathaway, and this is Detective Inspector Lewis.” He gestures to the older man, now standing at the sergeant’s shoulder. “We have some questions for you about this police box.”

That’s all he wants. “Such as?”  

“Can you prove it’s yours?” Lewis asks.

“Prove-? I’ve never had to prove _my_ TARDIS is mine before!” He sighs and looks at Rose. “Can you believe this?”

She shrugs. “They’re the police...”

“Well, it’s not as if I’ve got a log book!” he says, exasperated.

Rose gestures with her hand in a twisting motion. He frowns at her. She does it again. He frowns... and then the penny drops. He produces his key. “This do you?” he asks the annoying detectives. “I’m the Doctor, this is Rose, and this is my ship.”

“Show us that it opens the door,” Hathaway insists.

Rose gestures. “Go on.”

“How’d you get hold of it, anyway?” Lewis asks. “These are practically museum pieces now.” There’s suspicion in the man’s voice. He sighs. He’s just going to have to show them. Too late for anything else, and anyway, if they’re able to see the TARDIS maybe this is meant to happen. Maybe they’re supposed to know about it, and him.

He unlocks the door and pushes it open, then waves exaggeratedly towards the inside. The two detectives crowd around, and Hathaway steps in, then freezes. “I don’t believe... Sir, this isn’t right, is it?”

“Okay, now I know this is some kind of practical joke.” The older detective, Lewis, sounds angry now. “Knox, is this you? You hiding somewhere with a camera?”

Rose lays her hand on Lewis’s arm. “It’s not a joke. This is the TARDIS.”

“What’s a TARDIS when it’s at home?” he demands.

“Time and Relative Dimensions in Space.” The Doctor sighs again. “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Try me.” Hathaway’s tone is dry. “If I understand correctly, you’re claiming that this is capable of time and space travel. Am I correct?”

The inspector’s about to protest, but the Doctor grins suddenly. “That you are.”

“That’s nonsense!” Lewis objects. “There’s no such thing as time-travel, an’ even if there were why would it be in a police box?”

“Why not?” Hathaway counters, his eyes alight. He walks around the inside of the console room, touching the coral, bending to feel the grating, clearly memorising everything. “Michael J Fox time-travelled in a De Lorean.”

“That was a film!” Lewis is clearly losing patience. “Now, look, sir, if you don’t want me to have to arrest you-”

“On what charge?” The Doctor widens his eyes. “Leaving a police box that no-one but you and your friend here can see parked outside the Rad Cam for a couple of hours?”

“It is a bit ridiculous, sir, when he puts it like that,” Hathaway says.

“Wasting police time, making up nonsense about time-travel-”

“We could prove it,” Rose interrupts. “The Doctor could take you somewhere. Anywhere. Any _time._ ”

Ah. Not a good idea. The look on Lewis’s face makes clear what a very bad idea it is. He’s obviously lost someone, and he’s not over it – probably won’t ever be. And, like just about everyone in that position, he’s imagining the impossible.

And so now _he’s_ going to have to make clear that Rose’s invitation’s off the table.

Hathaway touches Lewis’s arm. “Sir, I don’t think it works like that. I mean, I haven’t studied a lot of physics, but I’m pretty sure what you’re thinking would cause a paradox or something nasty like that.”

Lewis is obviously struggling with himself, but finally he speaks. “Ah, it’s all a load of nonsense anyway. There’s no such thing as time-travel.”

Rose speaks gently. “There is. An’ maybe some day you’ll find out.” Ah. Good. She’s figured out the problem as well.

“Yeah,” the Doctor adds. “Has to be some reason you two could see my ship. Most people don’t, y’see. I’m guessing we’ll meet again some time.” He gives them a wide grin. “Maybe I’ll take you travellin’ then instead.” Maybe by then the inspector’ll be better able to understand that he can’t change the past.

 

***

 

Outside, Lewis is scratching his head. “It’s all nonsense. Got to be.”

“I’m not so sure,” James says, hands in his pockets and head bowed. “There are lots of things in the universe we don’t understand yet, sir. What’s to say this isn’t one of them?”

“But if it is true...” Lewis’s voice is very quiet. “You know what I could’ve done.”

James steps closer and lays a hand on his shoulder. “I know. I think... I suspect that’s why he wouldn’t take us.” He saw the look on the Doctor’s face and the way he was looking at Lewis. Somehow, he worked out what Lewis was thinking.  

Saving his wife from the hit-and-run driver – well, it’s a perfectly natural thought, isn’t it? But – and James really doesn’t understand this paradox stuff, and maybe he needs to read up on some physics – wouldn’t it lead to all sorts of other problems? How would it change Lewis’s life over the last four years, and everyone else’s, too? Would he and Lewis even have met, let alone become partners? Though that’s just being selfish. He knows his boss would be much happier – a different man – if his wife had lived.

A roaring sound shatters his thoughts, and he turns to look at the police box – the TARDIS, the Doctor called it. It’s... fading in and out!”

“What...?” Lewis catches his arm. “You seein’ what I’m seein’?”

“Yes.” He glances at his boss. “You believe it now?”

“I dunno. Maybe.”

 

 

Now, all they can see in front of them is the Rad Cam, with no sign of a blue police box. Lewis scratches his head. “We can’t tell anyone about this. Innocent’d have us down for a psych assessment as soon as look at us.”

James grins. “I’ve always thought we were halfway insane anyway. Come on.” He nudges Lewis. “It’s lunchtime. I’ll buy you a drink.”

Lewis stands for a moment, looking at the empty space where the police box stood; then he shakes himself and turns to James. “You’re on. Mine’s a pint.”

 

\- **end**

 

**Author's Note:**

> Unexpected _Doctor Who/Lewis_ connection: Lawrence Fox, who plays James Hathaway, is Billie Piper's husband.


End file.
